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    8/10/2009

    LISTEN 2 ME PLS

    每到该睡觉的时候 我就有压力......
    开着冷气的夏日的深夜，
    我是多么希望时间不是浪费在床上辗转反侧......
     
    短暂的旅行，让我整个人都舒展......
    其中，我的内心发生了质的变化.
    许多东西跟以前不同了，
    比如崂山、比如海边的浪......
    比如20年前的我自己......
     
    每次美好的旅行回来，我都会低沉和落寞一段日子。
    这也是我最讨厌自己的一点；
     
    我想说：
    信仰自己的灵魂，是一件做起来 比想象 要艰难得多的事情；
    躺在别人为自己挖的坟墓里，这就是我的悲哀！
    我只是想让所有人看到我吃肉看不到我挨打的生活状态，我宁愿把讨厌的肉放进口袋儿里，我也不说，不！
    这日子过的，每天都像似曾相识......
     
    一直在练习、学习如何控制自己的情绪，不要沉默不语、不要暴跳如雷、不要轻易爱谁、不要轻易放弃......
    我很努力的扮演着一种陌生的角色，是别人看起来我的生活丝毫不费力气......
     
    好吧，现在 我承认我有问题！
     
    呵呵...写下这句话，我斟酌很久，这样肆意破坏长久以来 建立起来的美好错觉究竟值得么！？
     
    我是一只伪装得很好的异类...
     
     
     
     
    1:32 AM | Blog it

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    漠儿 垂死的wrote:
    曾经的我对最后一句话感同身受，现在，我放弃了伪装，垂死如我者，已经习惯了把自己的“异”曝尸街头。

    我也曾经幻想会有出口，其实，周而复始才是宿命。
    Aug. 10

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